161209 allhopeseemslost?orjustanewbeginningforme?

sad? angry? disappointed? pained? i dunno the words to describe how i feel. im not exactly in the best of shape this week. down with a cold and fever's the last thing i can expect right before a competition. but i told myself that if im in it, ive got to give it my best shot. like my previous monthly shoot which i went in like right after 2 trainings only after a 9 month break? even though my arm was in ALOT of pain then, i still forced myself to complete it. pure determination? or just plain stupid. i dunno, u tell me?

anyway, today's was a surprise, cos coach tole me the day before that he wanted me to try a new way of shooting; quick shooting cos he agreed with me that i should be shooting quickly, like QUICKLY. then today he like just say shoot mock competition. oh wells, i thought it was kinda ok too, cos any mistake can try to rectify on thurs? so he gave us some cool coach pep talk right before our shoot, which i thought was SUPER enlightening. TAKEAWAY 1when you are shooting a string of good shots, you will tend to want to make sure the next shot is just like that too when you dont expect it. This is what happens to me too i guess. So coach says do not focus on that idea, cos it will give u smth more to think about. no point. just focus on your relationship and the target and all the normal stuff!! so anw i started with the mock right after that. TAKEAWAY 2DO NOT TAKE TOO LONG TO DO THE SIGHTERS!!! well as can be seen above, i keep taking too long to do the sighters and waste my energy and confidence. i wanted to assure myself that as long as i kept my relationship right and shot roughly around that area, i could get a 9 at least. well i kinda manage to do that. TAKEAWAY 3Just maintain your relationship and do not take too long to fire, UNLESS you are super super confident my first 6 shots could tell me roughly how the rest were gonna go. they were HORRIBLE. im pretty sure theres no point in mentioning what went wrong cos i really cannot pinpoint at all. lack of concentration? i dont think so. im really not sure. anw all i know is that i juz started blasting music to calm myself down and try to get my game back on. it helped in a way. i did better than the first 20 shots. BIG improvement. still very horrible though. anw TAKEAWAY 4I realize that i may be facing a couple of problems: 1--> my relationship may be problematic, i realize that only when i tilt the gun sideways its better. but with it comes the problem of getting shots top left cos of the recoil. when i aim the gun normally, i cant get a good relationship and if i try the recoil will cause the shot to go super up. 2--> i need to focus more and ignore my neighbouring competitors 3--> try to put my past and expectations away and just focus solely on my shot, and the next shot. VERY VERY HARD AND PROBLEMATIC 4--> lower my expectations alot. i know i managed to average 540 during trainings. like every 10 shots can get in the 9 ring before. but usually would be 8 in the 9 ring and 2 out, still avg 90 per 10 shot card. but then im still expecting it? 5--> today i was feverish still and im like shivering all over. 6--> my arm is still in pain, and im pushing the pain threshold and my body limits. might be a bad idea. working on it. 7--> my arm has not felt steady for 1 year already. its wobbling like HELL. cheston how the HELL do u shoot 580 plus still. its getting late la, ill think if ive got more to add tmr to this stuff. tmrs gonna be a new batch of rantings and collections i guess.

ciao
sky